Throw Back Thursday - Family

I've spoke about my dad's parents, but not any other family members yet. I talk about family good and bad because I believe it's helpful. I believe in the truth being told or how else can one fix it? One truth in my family is that many members have dealt with anxiety and addiction. No surprise there, huh? A lot of people deal with it. My mom did.

When I was in elementary school my mom was having a difficult time. I guess she was in her early thirties and she was depressed. I don't know if she knew it or if she knew what to do about it. She did discover that drinking a beer helped. But in time she needed more to keep the bad feelings away. Drinking was acceptable and she she saw no harm. Then, she needed it. Later in life, she became sober. She overcame it.  

It effected everyone in the family one way or another. Being the oldest and knowing what she did, I poured a lot of alcohol down the drain fighting back. I learned that addiction is found in families, so in my dislike for what my mother had become dependent on, I vowed to never drink. I have toasted at weddings etc, but to never party with alcohol or depend on it.  

To be honest, there's been times when I wish I hadn't made that promise. I deal with anxiety and have had some tough times. I knew that I could very well be an alcoholic too.

So, no I haven't drank in that way. I am very understanding of those who have. I am super proud that my mom was in recovery and was successful. There's more to our addiction stories, but I will leave it there for now. My mom past away 5/6 years ago this week, so she's been on my mind and heart.